Quarter-Life Ghost

[Verse 1]
Twenty-five, bad knees, bad habits
Phone face down, can't stand my reflection
Mirror like, "damn, you still here?"
I'm like, "yeah, guess I missed my exit"
Hairline gone, heartline flat
Hoodie like armor, I sink in the fabric
Scrollin' through strangers that "did it"
While I’m stuck in the same sad traffic
Doctor said move, I just laughed
Ordered my feelings in a paper bag
Say I want change, then I take a nap
Dream of a world where I'm not this mad
[Chorus]
I’m a quarter-life ghost in a borrowed body
Saying, "this year different" every damn morning
Obsessed with change but I won’t get started
I fade, I fade, I fade, but I don’t depart it
I keep losing days like they’re loose receipts
Promise I’ll fix me "next damn week"
If change is hard, then I’m concrete-hearted
I break, I break, I break, but I never start it
[Verse 2]
Every Monday, same script, same intro
"New me" speech in the bathroom window
Scale says, "bro," jeans say, "stop"
Shirt hides every plan that I drop
Friends getting weddings and mortgages
I’m getting winded from boredom and oranges
Laugh at my pain like it’s stand-up
Clown in the crowd, scared to stand up
Dad voice in my head like static
"Be a man," yeah, that trick’s magic
Can’t even walk past a gym
Without hearing my own brain laugh at it (ha)
[Chorus]
I’m a quarter-life ghost in a borrowed body
Saying, "this year different" every damn morning
Obsessed with change but I won’t get started
I fade, I fade, I fade, but I don’t depart it
I keep losing days like they’re loose receipts
Promise I’ll fix me "next damn week"
If change is hard, then I’m concrete-hearted
I break, I break, I break, but I never start it
[Bridge]
What if I don’t disappear
What if I stay right here
One deep breath, one cheap step
Still counts, even dragged by fear
What if this body’s not a joke
What if my worth ain’t in that smoke
What if today I move an inch
And call that inch a holy shift (hey)
[Chorus]
I’m a quarter-life ghost in a borrowed body
Still saying, "this year different" every damn morning
Obsessed with change, maybe this is starting
I shake, I shake, I shake, but I keep walking
I’ve been losing days like they’re loose receipts
But I write my name on this one at least
If change is hard, then I’m battle-hearted
I bend, I bend, I bend, but I haven’t parted

rap, Dark hybrid of emo-rap, punk energy, and swing-inspired bounce; minor-key jazz chords over a lurching, swung drum groove, warped bass, and scratchy guitar stabs. Male vocals that move between muttered rap, half-yelled hooks, and raw, cracked melodies. Choruses punch in with gang shouts and distorted doubles, bridge strips back to just piano, bass, and a close, confessional vocal before crashing back into the final hook., hip hop, punk, swing, emo