Poké-Peril: The Stupid Deaths of Pokémon Go

Hey, grab your phones, it's a beautiful day

But watch your step, 'cause danger's on the way

Pokémon calls, but here's the real story

About all the stupid deaths, a crazy Poké-glory

One guy ran into a pond, chasing a Magikarp

Thought he’d catch it quick, now he’s a waterpark star

Another kid climbed a tree, in pursuit of a Pidgey

Lost his footing, fell right down, oh what a sight to see

It's a wild, wild game, but don’t forget to be safe

Fumbling ‘round with your screen, is it worth a pricey price?

Hold your phone, keep your eyes wide, maybe stay on the ground

'Cause the Pokémon might be near, but danger’s all around!

Stupid deaths, caught in the hype, oh what a mess

Chasing Pikachu, but you might end up in distress

Poké-stop to danger, now they're famous in the news

All because of Pokémon Go, playing fools with no excuse

One guy sprinted past a train, for that elusive Growlith

Missed the warning, now he’s planning ‘bout a hospital stay

A girl ran through a busy street, in her Pokémon quest

Almost got a taxi kiss, now she’s for sure a viral guest

It's a crazy quest, but remember, safety first my friend

Look both ways, don’t be a victim, just a matter of common sense

Keep your feet on the ground, and your phone in check

Before you become another statistic, yeah, what the heck?

Stupid deaths, caught in the hype, oh what a mess

Chasing Pikachu, but you might end up in distress

Poké-stop to danger, now they're famous in the news

All because of Pokémon Go, playing fools with no excuse

So next time you’re out hunting, keep your humor tight

Laugh at the chaos but remember to do what's right

Pokémon’s fun, but don’t be the butt of the joke

Stay safe, stay smart, or you’ll end up broke

From near-misses to the headlines, it’s a silly sight

Pokémon Go — a hilarious fight for your life

Keep calm, catch ‘em all, but avoid the fatal falls

And maybe wear some shoes, or you'll be next in these Pokémon brawls!