Vengeance Against Myself

VERSE 1

They see the man shining — clean cuts, firm stride,

But Proverbs 14:13 says laughter hides tears inside.

They want my confidence, think I’m built from steel,

But Sirach 11:2 warned: appearance ain’t the real.

In the mirror I fracture, breaking piece by piece,

A war in my soul that will never know peace.

My past haunts loud, like footsteps in a hall,

And I’d trade every “win” not to remember it at all.

While the world sees strength, God sees the drown,

My smile is a curtain and behind it, I’m down.

CHORUS 1

Vengeance against myself — the war I hide,

A perfect shell with a storm inside.

They praise the man that I pretend to be,

But God sees the battle they’ll never see.

VERSE 2

Crowds clap for the moves they think I’m making,

But Sirach 21:2 echoes: flee the sin overtaking.

I walk with poise but inside I’m undone,

A fire burning wild with nowhere to run.

They think I’m connected, destined, sure,

But Romans 7:24 screams: “Who will make me pure?”

The man they admire is a crafted illusion,

Meanwhile my soul sinks under self-accusation.

I accept who I was, but I wish it never occurred —

My memories hit harder than any spoken word.

CHORUS 2

Vengeance against myself — the sin I chase,

The shadows I bury but still must face.

They love the version of me that’s fake,

But inside I bend, I break, I ache.

VERSE 3

Then God stepped close — thunder in the night,

Breaking through my fury with uncompromised light.

Sirach 2:1–5 whispered: fire refines the soul,

And I felt His presence carve me whole.

But still I fought Him — me versus His call,

Clinging to shame, afraid to release it all.

Yet Psalm 34:18 rose like breath in the grave,

And I learned even rebels can be saved.

My rage met His mercy, my fear met His hand,

And sorrow bowed down to a love I can’t command.

CHORUS 3

Vengeance against myself — but His grace cuts through,

The chains I forged, He shattered in two.

I fought His love but He didn’t withdraw,

He broke my darkness with holy awe.

VERSE 4

Now I rise rebuilt — not flawless, but renewed,

A man whose scars are no longer misconstrued.

2 Corinthians 5:17 opened the dawn’s first door,

And the past lost power, ruling me no more.

Inside matches outside — Christ made them align,

A son redeemed by a mercy divine.

No more masks, no mirror war — just truth restored,

A life remade by the wounds of the Lord.

FINAL CHORUS

Vengeance died when His love took hold,

He turned my ashes into streets of gold.

The man I was and the man they see —

Now stand united in His victory.