🎤 [Intro – Game Show Style w/ sirens]
🔊 “WELCOME TO... MICROWAVE MAYHEM!
Where logic dies... and leftovers scream.”
3… 2… 1… beep beep BEEEEP 💥
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🎤 [Verse 1 – Party Rap Flow]
Greg put foil on a hot pocket treat,
Now the sparks got rhythm and the fire got beat.
Said, “Bro, I saw this on Reddit once!”
Now he’s bald with eyebrows lookin’ like lunch.
Megan nuked eggs in a sealed-up cup,
She opened the door — now she’s all yolked up.
Pop goes the ego, brain’s all steamed,
The burrito’s fine, but her lashes screamed.
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🎤 [Pre-Chorus – Chanty & Wild]
🎵 If it glows or clicks, don’t nuke that bit!
🎵 If it leaks or farts — don’t microwave it!
🎵 Don’t test physics when you’re high as space,
🎵 Unless you like fires... all over your face!
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🎤 [Chorus – Loud, Group Shout Style]
🔥 MICROWAVE MAYHEM — BUTTONS DON’T LIE!
If it ain’t food, then tell it goodbye!
No forks! No cans! No soap! No dolls!
Unless you wanna repaint your walls. 💥
🔥 MICROWAVE MAYHEM — FLASH & FUME,
That’s not popcorn — that’s your doom.
Heat the pizza, not your soul,
We cook with brains, not toilet rolls. 🍕☠️
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🎤 [Verse 2 – Even Dumber]
Chad thought “Glowsticks might heat real nice,”
Now he glows in the dark and attracts mice.
Samantha microwaved her vape to charge,
Now she buzzes like a speaker at a bass-boosted barge.
Someone tried socks with a Tide Pod twist,
Now their laundry’s banned from the microwave list.
One girl cooked soap for a TikTok clip —
Now she’s got bubbles where her eyebrows sit.
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🎤 [Bridge – Slow & Lo-Fi Stupid]
🎵 You ever smelled melted Barbie legs?
🎵 You ever tasted burnt Tide Eggs?
🎵 You ever nuked a banana phone...
🎵 And summoned God… on speakerphone?
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🎤 [Final Chorus – Full Mayhem Mode]
🔥 MICROWAVE MAYHEM — BRAIN’S GONE BOOM!
This ain't a lab, it's your mom’s guest room!
No foil! No phones! No glitter! No tape!
You ain’t smart, just tempting fate.
🔥 MICROWAVE MAYHEM — PSA MODE:
Don't microwave stuff that ain't stove code.
Or end up with a viral clip and burns,
Because "Do Not Try This" is what no one learns. 😵💫💥
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🎤 [Outro – Cheesy PSA Voice + Static FX]
📢 “This message brought to you by the Society for Not Being Dumb in the Kitchen™.
Please… for the love of lasagna…
DON’T. NUKE. RANDOM. SH*T.”