Struggle or Be- Still

The sky bruises without a sound

Violet bleeding outward, round

Morning hangs its heavy blue

Like it’s waiting on a cue

There’s a fox playing dead in the field

Teeth it doesn’t reveal

Tail twitch fading in the frost

Counting what it’s worth to run

Crows on the wire go one, one, one

Measuring what I’ve become

The moon thins down to bone-white thread

Sewing doubt inside my head

Static in the sunrise, sunrise, sunrise

Blue behind my eyes, my eyes, my eyes

Pink goes pale, goes pale, goes pale

I don’t say, I don’t say, I don’t say what I think

Run, fox… run — or don’t, don’t, don’t this time

Gray along my spine, spine, spine

I could move, I could stay, could stay, could stay

Both feel far, feel far, feel far away

Gold drips thin from a tired sun

Whispers, “Stay,” then “Turn and run.”

Every shadow wears my face

Close chase, close chase

Feathers fall from somewhere high

Soft white reasons why

I hold them tight against my ribs

Like maybe they’re what living is

The wolves are thin but never gone

Breathing low beneath the lawn

One long howl across the plain

Asking if I’ll rise again

Static in the sunrise, sunrise, sunrise

Blue behind my eyes, my eyes, my eyes

Pink goes pale, goes pale, goes pale

I don’t say, I don’t say, I don’t say what I think

Run, fox… run — or just stay still, still, still

I don’t know if I will, will, will

Gray keeps leaning on my spine, spine, spine

Saying, “You don’t have to try.”

>Bridge]

I could fold into the frost

Call it calm, forget the cost

Let the tall grass close above

Call it rest instead of love

Or I could stand with shaking knees

Teeth bared at the breeze

Not because I’m sure I’ll win

Just because I’m still within

Run —

Stay —

Run —

Stay —

Sunrise

Sunrise

Sunrise —

Static in the sunrise, bright, bright, bright

But I haven’t picked a side, side, side

Blue presses at my chest, chest, chest

Says nothing. Just rests, rests, rests

Run, fox… run — or lie, lie, lie here long

Both feel almost wrong, wrong, wrong

Gray leans close, asking when — when — when

Run, fox — fox — fox —