Lately I been thinking different
Got a lot sitting on my mind
When I get back I ain’t easing in
I’m putting everything on the line
I’m tired of living halfway
Tired of feeling behind
I know what I’m supposed to be
I just ain’t there right now in time
I got more to handle now
This ain’t just about me
Everything I do from here
Gotta build what we need
I been picturing the house done right
Every weak spot replaced
Making something solid out of it
Something we can’t shake
I ain’t coming back the same
I’m locked in when I land
Every move more serious
Everything got a plan
But if I’m real I don’t even know
If you gon’ see it the same
Like I could give it everything
And it still won’t change
Like I be trying to show it
But it don’t come across
Like I’m carrying all this weight
But you don’t see the cost
I don’t say it out loud
I just keep it inside
Try to stay focused on building
While I’m fighting my pride
Headphones in I tune it out
World fade when I’m locked
Trying to turn these ideas real
Trying to make something pop
I don’t got nobody guiding me
I’m learning as I go
Trying to take what I know I got
And turn it into growth
But it’s hard when you putting in everything
And the results don’t show
Feel like I’m stuck in motion
Like I’m moving but moving slow
Some days I wake up motivated
Other days I feel drained
Still I get up and go chase it
Even when nothing change
I been giving it everything
Still feel like I’m behind
Like I’m racing against time
But I can’t cross the line
Bills still stacking up
While I’m stacking these hours
Trying to turn effort into something
But it’s losing its power
I don’t wanna keep saying
“I’m trying” and that’s it
I’m trying to actually show it
Turn it real make it stick
I know I’m not where I need to be
But I’m not where I was
And I keep reminding myself
I’m doing this for us
Even when it feel like nothing
Even when it feel off
I can’t stop now I’m too deep
I done came too far
When I get back I’m different
No more thinking I move
Everything I been saying
I’ma actually prove
I’m fixing what’s broken
In the house and in me
Trying to build something real
Something you can believe
I’m tired of second guessing
Tired of feeling unsure
I just want something stable
Something solid and pure
But I just hope when I do it
You don’t act like it’s small
‘Cause I’m putting everything in this
Trying to give you my all
Lately I been thinking different
I can feel it in me
I ain’t where I wanna be
But I’m closer than you see
I’m doing this for us
Even when it feel like nothing
Even when I feel stuck
I’m still turning it to something
I’m doing this for us
I can’t stop I came too far
Even if you don’t see it
I know exactly who we are
I can’t stop now
I came too far
Even when it don’t show
I know who we are
I’m building now
curly_g
