First Pint in Paradise

[Intro]
[Stomps and claps start]
"One more round!"
I just walked in
already in the deep end (hey!)
[Verse 1]
I said, "Hi, I’m from Boston"
Barman said, "I’m so sorry, pal"
Handed me a pint like a trophy
said, "Sip it slow, don’t you fall"
Fiddle hit a reel in my rib cage
Whistle sliced straight through my head
Somebody yelled, "Teach him the chorus!"
I hadn’t even found the men’s yet
[Chorus]
This Guinness got me praying to saints I can’t pronounce
This whiskey got me dancing on the wrong side of the bounce
The band just blew my sneakers clean off my Yankee feet
First night in an Irish pub
I ain’t making it back to my seat (hey! hey!)
[Verse 2]
Old lad said, "Son, that’s your first one"
I said, "Sir, I’m already gone"
He said, "Wait till we pour you a proper"
Then he poured me something strong
Girl at the bar taught me "sláinte"
I said "slan-tee", whole room groaned
They all raised a glass in my direction
"To the tourist who may never make it home!"
[Chorus]
This Guinness got me praying to saints I can’t pronounce
This whiskey got me dancing on the wrong side of the bounce
The band just blew my sneakers clean off my Yankee feet
First night in an Irish pub
I ain’t making it back to my seat (hey! hey!)
[Bridge]
[Music drops to claps and boots]
"Where ya from?" — "The States!"
"Can ya drink?" — "Debatable!"
"Can ya sing?" — "I’m terrible!"
"Perfect, get up on the table!" (woah!)
[Chorus]
Now Guinness got me swearing I was born across the sea
This whiskey got me hugging every stranger calling me
The band just blew my sneakers clean off my Yankee feet
First night in an Irish pub
yeah, this place knocked me clean off my seat (hey!)
First night in an Irish pub
someone text my mom I’ll be a week

Rowdy live Irish pub band feel with male vocals; fast tempo jig groove on acoustic guitar, fiddle, and tin whistle over big four-on-the-floor stomp-and-clap crowd. Verses are half-sung, half-comic storytelling; chorus explodes with shout-along gang vocals and pounding floor toms. Occasional whistle break and call-and-response chants keep the energy unruly and fun., comedy