Untitled

Not sure what feelings are normal

Am I angry or just hormonal?

Do I need these depression meds or a new situation

Always been good at math, didn’t have a proper example but still expected to solve every equation

I can tell you the correct answer but my method wasn’t step by step so I can’t really explain it

“Show your work” I’ll turn in a blank page then

My mind is all over the place you wouldn’t understand my directionally challenged brain

Don’t believe in right or wrong ways

Some people do things differently some people are afraid so they play it safe

Soon as I’m back on track everything goes up in flames

Burned every bridge following GPS to heavens gate

Storms rolling in might cause some delays

Might make some more mistakes but that’s okay

Fetal position holding my shoulders little girl trapped alone and caged

Door is unlocked doesn’t mean that I can run away

I know you’ll still paint the picture that way

I’m insane fucked in the brain staying stuck in this space

I did this to myself I never tried to escape

Had nowhere to run, but see I didn’t choose to stay

Smiling on the outside no matter what I feel that day

That confidence in your tone doesn’t make your feelings fact

Just turned around to feel another stab in the back

My feelings said out loud now you’re personally attacked

Got you feelin bad for your behavior

Got me saying sorry for pointing out where you lack

Its me and you against the problem but you never seem to get that

You take it to heart and up goes your guard

I’m the one who’s hurt but my words in between us I’d like to take back

Bad posture had to make myself smaller

Seeing eye to eye was never an option,

Just a walking reminder of everything you never had

See

We can’t turn words to actions when there’s no accountability for how you act

How I feel is overwhelming on the defense you always react

Always walking away you don’t gotta be like that

Are we talking or arguing?

Is this healthy or bad?

These red flags feel normal when they’re all I’ve ever had

So confused on what to do wish I could ask dad

The grass is green where you choose to water it, forget having any colored flags

Nothing but lies, gaslight me until I’m color blind

Nothing feels normal when wrong feels right

I try to be good they still walk out my life

Starting to wonder why I even try

I finally leave my cage

They all cheer, call me brave

Little do they know

The trap was always in my mind

I have to lock the door now..

It’s only safe when I’m inside

💔

I look to the sky and wish for the rain

It’s funny my dad would shush me because I’d always get my way

See I don’t wait for sunshine to go outside and play

I don’t hope for the best I don’t hide the pain

I throw my hands in the air and I dance anyway

“I CALL THAT FAVOR” my mom would laugh and say

She took me outside

Had to show me the night sky

We may never see eye to eye

But I thought you should know..

I forgave you a long time ago