Flowers for Myself

(Intro)
(Yeah… yeah…)
I seen it clear as day…
Ain’t nobody warn me ‘bout this kinda pain…

(Verse 1)
I had a dream I was dressed in all white
Cold as the winter, no breath, no life
Mama in the front row crying her eyes out
Saying “baby please wake up right now”
But I couldn’t move, I couldn’t speak
Just laid there while they prayed on me
All them nights I felt alone and lost
Now I see what all that pain done cost

Homies in the back like “that ain’t right”
Posting my face, candlelight
Saying they love me, wish I could see
All that love when it mattered to me

(Pre-Chorus)
I gave my heart, they ain’t feel my pain
Smiled through storms, danced in the rain
Now I’m gone, they screaming my name
Funny how love come after the grave

(Chorus)
I seen flowers for myself
People crying, saying “he needed help”
Too many nights I was by myself
Fighting demons, I ain’t tell nobody else
Now I’m laying in a casket, dressed so clean
Everybody saying “he was a king”
But where was y’all when I couldn’t sleep?
When I was drowning way too deep…

(Verse 2)
Pastor preaching ‘bout a better place
But I’m stuck watching my mama’s face
Every tear feel like a knife in me
Wishing I could rewrite my story
Little ones asking where I went
They too young to even comprehend
All that hurt that I held inside
Turned into something I couldn’t hide

I remember nights I cried alone
Phone in my hand but ain’t call nobody home
Didn’t wanna feel like I was weak
Now I’d give anything just to speak

(Pre-Chorus)
I gave my all, they ain’t see my scars
Fought my battles behind them bars
Now they love me for who I was
But it’s too late to feel that love

(Chorus)
I seen flowers for myself
People crying, saying “he needed help”
Too many nights I was by myself
Fighting demons, I ain’t tell nobody else
Now I’m laying in a casket, dressed so clean
Everybody saying “he was a king”
But where was y’all when I couldn’t sleep?
When I was drowning way too deep…

(Bridge)
If I wake up, I’ma change my ways
Tell my people that I ain’t okay
Hold on tighter, let my pride fall down
‘Cause I don’t wanna see that casket now

(Outro)
(Yeah…)
Don’t give me flowers when I’m gone…
I need ‘em while I’m here…

melodic rap