Past Thirty

Verse 1

I signed my name at nineteen, chasing something I could not explain

Boots hit dust in places most folks never say

Letters home were simple, kept the truth out of the lines

Told her I was steady, told her I was fine

But the nights were loud with silence, and the days burned slow

Learned how to carry things no one else should know

Pre-Chorus

Came back with a steady hand and a quiet tone

But I left pieces of me in a place I won’t go

Chorus

I never thought I’d make it past thirty years

Lived like every sunrise might disappear

Now I sit on this porch with a glass of brown

Three gold dogs at my feet, sun going down

I smile when I can, keep the rest inside

A gentle man with a war I still hide

Verse 2

I tried to build a life here, tried to settle into peace

But love don’t stand a chance when the past won’t release

She said I was distant, said I felt like stone

Said she couldn’t reach me even when I was home

I don’t blame her leaving, I don’t blame the end

Some things break slow and never quite mend

Pre-Chorus

I learned how to listen, learned how to stay calm

But there’s a storm that still lives under this arm

Chorus

I never thought I’d make it past thirty years

Every plan I made just disappeared

Then he came along and changed my mind

Little hands gave me a reason to try

Now I sit on this porch with a glass of brown

Three gold dogs at my feet, sun going down

I laugh when I can, keep the rest inside

A gentle man with a war I still hide

Bridge

My boy grew tall, stronger than me

He never saw the things I see

But he knows enough to read my eyes

Knows when I’m there and when I’m not inside

I stayed for him when I would have gone

That’s the truth I hang my life upon

Verse 3

Peace time taught me patience, war time taught me cost

Every friend I buried left a line I never crossed

Now I walk these mornings with the dogs and the sky

Thankful for the quiet, though I still ask why

Final Chorus

I never thought I’d make it past thirty years

Now every extra day feels borrowed here

I take it slow, let the whiskey burn

Let the old ghosts talk, let the young man learn

And I sit on this porch with a fading light

Three gold souls keeping watch tonight

I found some grace in the life I survived

A gentle man, still learning to be alive

Outro

Yeah, I made it past thirty

Didn’t think I would

Still carrying the weight

Still doing what I should