"Beeman Christmas"
(To the tune of “Jingle Bells” with a bluegrass twist)
[Verse 1]
Well, it’s Christmas time again, down at Beeman’s place,
Grandpa’s on the roof, yellin’, “This time Santa’ll stay!”
The tree’s a sight to see, with beer cans hangin’ low,
And Cousin Billy Bob’s racin’ sleighs that really go!
[Chorus]
Oh, Beeman Christmas, wild as it can be,
Trash can lids and possum pie, and spiked-up sweet tea!
Hey! Beeman Christmas, chaos through the night,
Duct tape wrapped around the tree, and moonshine shining bright!
[Verse 2]
Now, Mama’s in the kitchen, bakin’ up a storm,
With possum pie and fruitcake that'll keep ya feelin’ warm.
Uncle Bubba’s laughin’, drinkin’ from his jar,
While Aunt Jolene is hollerin’, “Who done wrapped my car?!”
[Chorus]
Oh, Beeman Christmas, wild as it can be,
Trash can lids and possum pie, and spiked-up sweet tea!
Hey! Beeman Christmas, chaos through the night,
Duct tape wrapped around the tree, and moonshine shining bright!
[Bridge]
Billy Bob got stuck, slidin’ down the flue,
He sat on a squirrel and lost his left shoe.
Jolene grabbed her trap, we buttered him with care,
He popped out like a bottle cap, and soot was everywhere!
[Verse 3]
Grandpa played his banjo, and we sang a little tune,
‘Bout cows a-birthin’ Christmas Eve beneath the winter moon.
We swapped our mystery presents, I got Bubba’s sock,
While Grandpa got some pickled eggs inside a coffee pot!
[Chorus]
Oh, Beeman Christmas, wild as it can be,
Trash can lids and possum pie, and spiked-up sweet tea!
Hey! Beeman Christmas, chaos through the night,
Duct tape wrapped around the tree, and moonshine shining bright!
[Outro]
So, here’s to Beeman holidays, they’re messy but they’re ours,
With love and laughs and family, and a sleigh made outta cars!
Raise a mason jar tonight, and toast the ones you’re near,
Merry Beeman Christmas, y’all, we’ll see ya next year!
