I’m a Gay Man (But a Lesbian)

Verse 1 (sassy, strut-beat):

I cut my hair like Ani Di,

I move my hands when I tell a story.

I drink iced coffee, I hate white men,

I’m a gay man, but a lesbian.

⸻

Chorus (campy, danceable):

I’m a gay man, but a lesbian,

Tell me, baby, where do I begin?

I want the drama, I want the femme,

I’m a gay man — but a lesbian.

⸻

Verse 2 (witty detail):

I wear flannel like second skin,

I’ve got opinions on Rachael Ray’s spin.

I U-Haul feelings on the second date,

I’m a gay man — but my gay is gay-and-great.

⸻

Chorus:

I’m a gay man, but a lesbian,

I like her boots and I like his grin.

Queer confusion is my best friend,

I’m a gay man — but a lesbian.

⸻

Bridge (spoken over beat, RuPaul-style):

Call me daddy, call me dyke,

Call me both, it feels just right.

Check your labels, tear them thin,

I’m a gay man… but a lesbian.

⸻

Final Chorus (big, tongue-in-cheek anthem):

I’m a gay man, but a lesbian,

Flip the script — and play it again.

It’s not straight, it’s not pretend,

I’m a gay man — but a lesbian.