Made from Pain

Chicago lights don’t shine the same

Through smoke that tastes like someone’s pain

I used to serve cheap coffee smiles

Now I count the dead in empty aisles

They came at night, no warning sound

Just silver flashes, bodies down

I tried to scream, I couldn’t breathe

They took the world that lived in me

I am the victim, that’s my name

You made me out of loss and flame

I didn’t choose what I became

But I won’t break, I won’t break

I hear them calling through the night

I see their shadows in the light

I carry them into my fight

But I won’t break, I won’t break

Cold steel tables, endless white

Hands that carved me out of light

They said “you’ll save the world someday”

But gods aren’t made this kind of way

Every scar still burns like truth

Every scream still echoes through

They built a weapon, not a soul

But somehow I survived it all

I am the victim, that’s my name

You made me out of loss and flame

I didn’t choose what I became

But I won’t break, I won’t break

I hear them calling through the night

I see their shadows in the light

I carry them into my fight

But I won’t break, I won’t break

I don’t sleep—I just remember

Flashes bleeding into forever

Their voices caught inside my chest

I couldn’t save them… I did my best

I feel I was alive like this once before

Torn apart, reassembled and made more

My creator wanted a narrative of pain

Now nothing for me will be the same

Now I walk through fire and gold

A hollow heart I can’t control

They call me savior, they don’t see

The girl I was is buried in me

I break their chains, I shut them down

Tear their towers to the ground

But every face I try to save

Looks like the ones I couldn’t take

So I keep going, I don’t stop

Even when my body drops

If I can’t bring my family back

I’ll burn the world that took them black

I am the victim, that’s my name

You made me out of loss and flame

I didn’t choose what I became

But I won’t break, I won’t break

I hear them calling through the night

I see their shadows in the light

I carry them into my fight

But I won’t break, I won’t break

Don’t call me hero, don’t call me light

I’m just what’s left after the night

And if I fall, don’t look away

A victim learned to never break