The Editor

​(Verse 1)

My mind is a forgiveness machine

Working overtime to scrub the crime scenes clean

I look behind me and I see a golden glow

Where there was only wreckage, I see a picture show

I have a habit of sanding down the wood

Taking the splintered parts and calling them "good"

I take the careless words you used to throw

And turn them into poetry before I let them go.

​(Chorus)

So today, I have to be the one who stays

I have to love myself enough to look away

Because if I don't hold me close, I know what I’ll do

I’ll draft a better version of the truth

I’ll paint a halo on a silhouette of dark

I’ll miss the fire and forget the burn mark

I have to love myself first, and I have to be fast

Before my heart edits the danger out of the past.

​(Verse 2)

It’s a survival instinct, I suppose

To smell the thorn and tell myself it’s a rose

I remember you taller, I remember you kind

I crop out the shadows you left in my mind

But the archives are lying, the footage is faked

I’m romanticizing every mistake

You were a drought, but I remember rain

I’m addicted to finding the beauty in pain.

​(Chorus)

So today, I have to be the one who stays

I have to love myself enough to look away

Because if I don't hold me close, I know what I’ll do

I’ll draft a better version of the truth

I’ll paint a halo on a silhouette of dark

I’ll miss the fire and forget the burn mark

I have to love myself first, and I have to be fast

Before my heart edits the danger out of the past.

​(Bridge)

Nostalgia is a liar in a velvet coat

It softens the hands that were around my throat

But reality is safer, though it’s cold on the skin

I won't open the door to let the ghosts back in

I’m firing the editor, I’m burning the script

I’m remembering the way that the narrative slipped.

​

​(Chorus)

So today, I have to be the one who stays

I have to love myself enough to look away

Because if I don't hold me close, I know what I’ll do

I’ll draft a better version of the truth

I’ll paint a halo on a silhouette of dark

I’ll miss the fire and forget the burn mark

I have to love myself first, and I have to be fast

Before my heart edits the danger out of the past.

​(Outro)

No more halos.

No more revisions. I'm

Just me, standing here.

Making the right decision.

I love me first today.

I keep the truth... and I stay.

​

​"Sanding down the wood": Taking a rough, painful reality and smoothing it over in your memory so it doesn't hurt to touch anymore.

​"The Editor": Your brain's tendency to cut out the bad scenes (the arguments, the disrespect) and keep only the highlight reel.

​"Paint a halo on a silhouett