Unfinished Goodbye

They said it on a Tuesday

Coffee going cold in my hand

Your name sat on the table

Like a word I couldn’t understand

I laughed at something stupid

Then the silence hit my chest

How am I supposed to hold you

When I can’t hold all the rest

I don’t know how to feel

I don’t know where to put this

Tears hide

Heart’s stiff

Staring at the ceiling in your old knit sweater

If I can’t find the right pain

Can I love you any less?

I’m just here

In this unfinished goodbye together

You still send me bad emojis

Ask me how to fix your phone

I talk about the weather

Skip the fact you’re almost gone

Some days I want to scream it

Some days I just make the bed

Grief is in the doorway

But it’s fog inside my head

Maybe feeling nothing

Is just feeling overwhelmed

Maybe love is bigger

Than the words I never tell

So I’ll sit beside your beeping

Fold your shirts

Pour you some tea

If I don’t know how to feel

You can still know what you mean to me