King Mud Crab

[Intro - Heavy, fuzzy bass. Slow, sludgy drums. Sound of mud bubbling.]
[Deep, laid-back voice]
Mud on my shell... fungi on my back...
Been sittin' here so long... the rocks became my stack...
Time to move...

[Verse 1 - Slow, groovy, thick riffs]
Deep in the Tide Island caves where the sun don't ever shine
I've been gatherin' the ages, lettin' nature take its time
Mushrooms growin' on my back, corals in my cracks
I'm the king of camouflage, the master of the relax
They call me Taikun Zamuza, the crab with many shells
I move so slow you'll think I'm just a story someone tells
But underneath this muddy coat, this fungal, rocky throne
There's a crab who's waitin' for the moment to be known

[Pre-Chorus - Building slowly]
Mud... (CAKE!)
Rocks... (QUAKE!)
Spores... (AWAKE!)
TAIKUN! (SHAKE!)

[Chorus - Sludgy, groovy, head-bobbing]
TAIKUN ZAMUZA! KING OF THE MUD AND STONE!
TAIKUN ZAMUZA! I PREFER TO BE ALONE!
TAIKUN ZAMUZA! HAMMER CLAW WILL SMASH THE FLOOR!
TAIKUN ZAMUZA! BREAK MY SHELL? I'LL SHOW YOU MORE!

[Verse 2 - Still slow, but building intensity]
Phase one, I'm slow and steady, let you chip away at me
The mushrooms pop, the spores cloud up—now you can barely see
I hammer down, the earth quakes hard, I send you to your knees
My pincer stabs from every angle, movin' with the breeze
But every piece you break off makes me lighter, makes me fast
I'm shuckin' off the ages now—the real me's here at last!
My orange shell is crackin', you can see what's underneath
A smaller crab with bigger plans and lightning in my teeth

[Pre-Chorus 2]
Shell... (CRACK!)
Spores... (BLACK!)
Speed... (ATTACK!)
TAIKUN! (FIGHT BACK!)

[Chorus]
TAIKUN ZAMUZA! KING OF THE MUD AND STONE!
TAIKUN ZAMUZA! I PREFER TO BE ALONE!
TAIKUN ZAMUZA! HAMMER CLAW WILL SMASH THE FLOOR!
TAIKUN ZAMUZA! BREAK MY SHELL? I'LL SHOW YOU MORE!

[Bridge - Slows to a crawl, trippy and atmospheric]
The mushrooms and me... we got a deal, man...
I carry 'em around, they help me blend...
[Long pause]
...and when you get too close?
[Whisper]
...they blind ya.

THAT'S SYMBIOSIS, BABY.

[Guitar Solo - Stoner rock, fuzzy, spacey, slow and mean]

[Final Form Section - Tempo picks up, but still groovy]
NOW MY SHELL IS GONE, MY TRUE FORM'S HERE TO PLAY
I'M WHITE AND BLUE AND SMALLER—BUT I'M FASTER ANY DAY
MY HAMMER CLAW'S A DRILL NOW, SPINNIN' ROUND AND ROUND
LIGHTNING CRACKLES FROM MY BACK, I'M THE BADDEST CRAB IN TOWN!
I'LL SPIT SOME POISON CLOUDS, I'LL CHARGE MY CLAWS WITH SHOCK
I'LL TUNNEL THROUGH THE CAVE WALLS AND ATTACK AROUND THE CLOCK
YOU THOUGHT THE FIRST TWO FORMS WERE TOUGH? YOU HADN'T SEEN THE BEST
WELCOME TO THE FINAL ROUND—NOW PUT MY PATIENCE TO THE TEST!

[Chorus - Faster now, but still heavy]
TAIKUN ZAMUZA! LIGHTNING IN MY CLAWS!
TAIKUN ZAMUZA! I'M BREAKIN' ALL YOUR LAWS!
TAIKUN ZAMUZA! DRILL CLAW SPINNIN' FAST!
TAIKUN ZAMUZA! THIS FORM'S BUILT TO LAST!

[Outro - Slows back down]
The mud calls me back
The fungi waits for me
I’ll make another shell
And you’ll forget… you ever saw me

Stoner Rock, Nerdcore, male