[Verse 1: Mark]
I like ’em grilled, split down the middle
Steam risin’ up while I nibble your pickle
Ballpark beef and that juicy snap
Load it with mustard, I’m takin’ no crap
You think you’re tough, Todd? Please, you’re a fraud
I deep-throat dogs like it’s my full-time job
Footlong glory, ain’t afraid to gag
You ketchup-drippin’ poser, wave your surrender flag
⸻
[Verse 2: Todd]
Oh Mark, you basic, you can’t compete
With my double-dog dare and my spicy meat
I like ’em sweaty, straight off the grill
Slap ‘em on buns, give me that thrill
I bite, I moan, I choke, I sigh
Your lips can’t handle what I deep-fry
Vienna beef, baby, grease on my chest
I’m the top dog here — you’re just the rest
⸻
[Pre-Chorus: Both]
You bring the relish, I’ll bring the heat
We go down hard on that processed meat
Nothin’s sacred when the dogs come out
It’s a cookout, baby — we’re loud and proud
⸻
[Chorus: Both]
We’re just two boys in love with weiners
Meat between the buns, no in-betweeners
Tongues get tangled in the backyard haze
Sippin’ on slushies and suckin’ for days
Hotdog battle, no one wins
Just sweaty lips and sausage sins
Mark and Todd, full send, no shame
Hotdog love — we came, we came
⸻
[Verse 3: Mark]
I toast the buns while I flex in the mirror
Grill marks on the dogs couldn’t look any clearer
Got buns of steel, abs of meat
My frank’s so fat it don’t skip a beat
⸻
[Verse 4: Todd]
You call that girth? Man, please, step back
Mine curves like a rainbow and makes a loud smack
Put it in foil, let it stew
Pop that top — I’ll outglizzy you
⸻
[Breakdown – Screamed Bridge: Both]
STUFF IT
BITE IT
LICK IT CLEAN
OUR LOVE IS PORK AND GASOLINE
TWO DOG DADDIES IN A FLAME WAR
SOFT ON THE OUTSIDE, FILL ME MORE
⸻
[Chorus: Both]
We’re just two boys in love with weiners
All-beef heat, no cold demeanor
Throat game strong in the summer haze
Mark and Todd: the gay ol’ blaze
Hotdog duel, no truce in sight
We snack all day, we slam all night
No filter, no fear, no shame
It’s hotdog love — we came, we came
⸻
[Outro – Acoustic Emo Fade Out]
So if you see us, lips on links
Don’t ask no questions, don’t overthink
Just know it’s love…
With extra meat. 🌭
