My life

El Paso born, Santa Fe rain

Dust in my lungs, I grew up with pain

Seventeen, California came

Thought distance would wash my shame

Heaven line angel anaheim kids with my heartbeat eyes I cry

Still remember the day I told them goodbye.

Alone Costa Mesa mornings, sun too bright

Feels like God keeps showing me my life

Had a wife named Elise, that love ran deep

Like roots in the desert, buried, asleep

Addiction came and poisoned the creek

I drowned in the water I swore I would keep

Heather came later like fate got bored.

A new kind of love I did not ask for

Eight months carrying my unborn son

While I’m trying to learn how to not run

I treated her wrong, I know that’s mine

Thought silence was strength, turned out it was pride

She packed her bags, Alabama sky

I stayed here wondering why I was the guy

Who breaks what he loves, without even trying.

[Hook] (melodic heartbreak)

Late night drives in the cold wind

Radio low cause my mind’s loud again

Too much love I don’t know how to carry

Too much pain I don’t know how to bury

God, if you hear me, just show me where to go

I done lost so much I got room to grow

Don’t count me out in this life I chose

Overdose Tennessee good dude died young

I swear I saw his ghost by my storage last nigh

he was trying to talk to me

Like, “Bro slow down, take care of your soul

You been breaking hearts but you still not whole.”

I looked at the sky like God, I know

I just never learned how to let things go

Life got heavy, I ain’t built perfect

I just built stubborn and I just keep working

If want grace I gotta earn it

I want forgiveness but I gotta deserve it

Elise still lives in the core of my chest . That’s my wife

Heather holds a child that’s half of my breath

A brand new life a little me I ain’t there Mae’s me sad .. There are nights I cry and nights I confess

To a ceiling fan spinning like life and death

People think love is a movie scene

They don’t know the part where you fall apart unseen

They don’t know the nights I prayed on my knees

Hands shaking, begging God, please. And heather I’m still mad cause you took my car l.o.l

Late night drives in the cold wind

Radio low cause my mind’s loud again

Too much love I don’t know how to carry

Too much pain I don’t know how to bury

God, if you hear me, just show me where to go

I done lost so much I got room to grow

Don’t count me out in this life I chose

I’m still here

I’m still here.

[Verse 3] (this is where the listener cries)

Maybe one day my kids will ask

Dad why you always ran from the past

Why you say you loved but you loved too fast

Why the good things slipped through your hands like sand.why .

I’ll tell them the truth, I won’t hide my scars

I’ll show them the cracks in my heart like art

I’ll tell them sometimes loving is hard

And sometimes you learn too late where to start

I ain’t ashamed of the roads I took

I ain’t ashamed of the pages I shook

My life is a scripture God never overlooked

I’m still getting written in His holy book