[Verse 1] – [swaggering, almost bragging]
He bought me a drink at the crossroads bar
Said "I've never seen a woman with a neck like a scar"
I said "Honey, you ain't lookin' close enough—
The scar's the least of it. Turn off the lights. It gets rough."
He laughed. Said "I ain't afraid of no ghost."
I said "Good. 'Cause I ain't the one who haunts. I'm the host."
[Chorus] – [shouted, stomping, with backing vocals in parentheses]
He forgot I don't have a neck
(She don't have a neck!)
So when he went for my throat in the dark
He grabbed nothing but air and a curious spark
(Where's her neck?!)
He said "How do I bite you?" I said "That's the trick—
You don't. Now hold still while I show you my spine-whip."
[Verse 2 – dirtier, more gleeful]
He wanted to leave a mark. I said "Baby, please.
I've been missing my head since the barley freeze.
You think a hickey's gonna make me blush?
I've got farmers' teeth in my horse's brush."
He tried to pray. I covered his mouth with my palm.
Said "God left this county. I'm the only charm."
[Chorus] – [repeat, more chaotic, laughing between lines]
He forgot I don't have a neck
(She don't have a neck!)
So when he went for my collarbone next
He found a hinge and a whole lot of context
(What's that smell?)
He said "Are you human?" I said "Not since '92.
Now stop asking questions and let me use you."
[Bridge] – [music drops to just voice and one guitar string, plucked once per line]
Morning came. He was still alive.
Lucky for him. Unlucky for his pride.
I left him tied to the headboard with his own belt rope.
And a note that just said:
[spoken, low]
"Thanks for the hope.
Too bad I don't have a throat for the rope."
[Outro] – [full band returns, stomping and clapping, then slows to a halt]
So if you meet a woman in a crossroads bar
And her shadow moves faster than her body by far
And you reach for her neck and your hand finds a hinge—
[laugh, then spoken]
Run, baby.
That's not a woman.
That's a promise.
[single whip crack. Fade to laughter, then hooves.]
AsheTheHyena