[Verse 1]
If it ain’t Asian… I ain’t chasing
If she ain’t ABG… she is not the one for me
If she ain’t tofu… she ain’t waifu
If she ain’t squinting… I ain’t sprinting
If it ain’t rice…..it ain’t nice
If she ain’t yellow… it’s good bye, not hello.
Yea you know what I’m saying.
[Verse 1]
If my dog ain’t in danger… she remains a stranger.
If it ain’t sushi… then excuse me.
If it’s not Oriental… it’s just a rental.
If it ain’t sideways… hit the highways.
If it ain’t noodles… imma toodles.
If her daddy ain’t a Samurai… Imma say bye-bye.
[Verse 1]
If she ain’t Chow Mein… stay out of my Lane.
If it ain’t anime… then I ain’t tryna play.
If she ain’t from Japan… I ain’t uh fan.
If she ain’t hentai… I ain’t senpai
If it ain’t Kung Fu… I ain’t with chu.
If it ain’t Ying Yang… then no ring, gang!
[Punchline 1]
If you can make her laugh and giggle… you can make her cheeks clap and jiggle. Jiggle.
[Music background stops]
[Studio call dialogue]
“ Hold up, Hold up, cut the music. Wait a minute. Let’s switch up and be respectful here”
“Here me one more time”
[Background music returns]
[Verse 2]
If she ain’t my type… I ain’t chasin’.
If she ain’t got vibes… she ain’t amazin’.
If she ain’t real talk… I ain’t engag-in’.
If the love ain’t cooked right… I ain’t tastin’.
Yeah, you know what I’m sayin’, you know what I’m sayin’.
[Verse 2]
If she ain’t loyal… then she just a stranger.
If she bring peace… then I’m out of danger.
If the mood ain’t right… then ex–cuse me.
If the soul ain’t bright… that’s just a rental to me.
If she can’t ride the wave… hit the highways.
If she ain’t on my level… I’m gone sideways.
[Verse 2]
If she ain’t matchin’ energy… stay outta my lane.
If she ain’t yin to my yang… we don’t do the same.
If she ain’t playful… then I ain’t tryna play.
If she ain’t lifting me up… I’m not gonna stay.
If she ain’t golden-hearted… then it’s goodbye, not hello.
If she ain’t bringing passion… then I’m layin’ low.
[Punchline 2]
If you make her laugh and giggle…
you might make that whole room wiggle. Wiggle.
[Verse 3]
Japan!
タイプじゃねぇなら… 追いかけねぇし。
バイブスねぇなら… マジ惹かれねぇし。
リアルじゃねぇなら… 関わらねぇし。
愛がイマイチなら… 味もしねぇし。
Yeah、わかるだろ？ わかるだろ？
[Verse 4]
China!
她不够忠诚… 那就是个路人。
她带来平静… 我就远离风云。
气氛若不对… 那我直接告辞。
灵魂若不亮… 在我这只是租赁。
浪都不会冲… 请她走上公路。
层次跟不上… 哥转身就换路线。
[Verse 5]
Korea!
에너지 안 맞으면… 내 길에서 비켜.
음양 안 맞으면… 우리 스타일은 달라.
장난기 없으면… 난 놀 생각도 없어.
나를 올려주지 않음… 머무를 이유도 없어.
금같은 마음 아니면… 헬로 말고 그대로 안녕.
열정 못 가져오면… 난 조용히 로우로 내려가.
[Punchline 3]
Philippines
“Pag napatawa mo siya at napa-giggle…
mag-i-wiggle na buong room, swear.”
“Pag napatawa mo siya, napa-giggle…
’di magtatagal, yung pisngi sa likod magki-clap at jiggle. Jiggle”
If it ain’t Asian… I ain’t chasing
If it ain’t Asian… I ain’t chasing
[Stop background music]
[Rapper dialogue to listeners]
“Me. Love. You. Long. Time.”
“Hey you…yea you…The one listening to my banger… Hope I didn’t offend you, if so Pho- you”
“Or better…Me…. Hahahaha” “I’m just playing.”
“But for real…” “Alright studio Lettuce Wrap this up” “Peace, Waifus”
Zuko_Wabe
