Searching

I’m searching for something,

something I must’ve lost along the way,

a shadow sitting in my chest

that refuses to tell me its name.

I reach for it,

but my hands close around nothing,

an emptiness so deep

even my breath disappears in it.

Something hurts—

a pain without a reason,

a crack spreading through me

like cold fire.

I try to read the signs,

to understand,

to make sense of whatever this is,

but everything stays silent.

Only my heart screams,

like it’s about to crumble in my hands.

And while I search,

while I run,

while I chase after this nameless thing,

it starts swallowing me.

From the inside.

Piece by piece.

I don’t know what’s missing.

I only know

that it’s eating me alive.

And that every second

breaks a little more of me.