Captain Hook Been Downsized - Version 2

Upon the poop deck it was plain to perceive

The horizon"s double blue on blue view

Always spoke of time"s endless mysteries

To the watchful eye of the elegant Captain Hook

Below he bellowed commands to his crew

And they moved with much purpose and skill

Within the sail rigging and about the ship

He was in his element plotting revenge

Thinking he would have forever in Neverland

To study his trusty dog-eared maps

And hatch schemes against Peter Pan

But he was forced to retire to Arizona

When he failed to read the fine print

On his piracy contract it spelled his doom

One small clerical error had done him in

He failed to file every other thousand years

And was replaced with his dopey first mate

On his wall a dueling sword gathers dust

For poker games replaced his old reprisals

He lives in a western ranch house now

His new Rocky seas are mountain ranges

With succulent cacti scattered in-between

Being landlocked he has lost his sea legs

For the swaying was the gait of his horse

Muddy cow hands replaced salty sailors

And being stationary was his only course

His one concession was buried treasure

Of Spanish doubloons and jeweled goblets

I wouldn"t cross him and steal his plunder

The question if Hook will kill is a certain bet

Not with a sword or by walking a plank

For he has gotten good with a six shooter

And it won"t be loaded with blanks.