[Verse 1]
I keep the receipts in a jar by the sink
Each one a small proof of what I chose not to think
The apology dries where the window won't close
I know every version of the damage I caused
[Pre-Chorus]
Don't tell me I'm trying
I know what that means
A door left half-open
A hand on the screen
[Chorus]
I am unsettled, I can't lie still
Every good intention bends against my will
You find me counting the ways I let you down
With both feet planted, I keep falling through the ground
[Verse 2]
I borrowed your patience and spent it too fast
Turned one honest question into evidence from the past
The kettle goes quiet, the hallway stays cold
I rehearse being better, then do what I'm told
By the oldest fear I carry like a key
[Pre-Chorus]
Don't call me forgiven
The word doesn't fit
I still hear the hinges
Each time I admit
[Chorus]
I am unsettled, I can't lie still
Every good intention bends against my will
You find me counting the ways I let you down
With both feet planted, I keep falling through the ground
[Instrumental Interlude]
[Bridge]
If I peel back the reasons, there's no hidden saint
Just a room full of portraits I never could paint
I wanted your mercy to make me brand new
But mercy is not a disguise I can borrow from you
[Final Chorus]
I am unsettled, say it plain
I built my shelter out of weather and blame
You find me standing where the old cracks start
With every failing laid open, every lock around my heart
[Outro]
The jar by the sink catches morning again
I leave it unopened, but I don't call that change
Not yet
Not yet