“PAYNE (The Weight of Silence)”
[Intro]
Yeah…
Another night, same war in my chest.
Another voice sayin’ I’m better off dead.
They say “Pain builds character,”
But I’m tired of being built outta scars.
I’m tired of living like a ghost
in a body that ain’t mine.
[Verse 1]
I wake up to a ceiling full of thoughts that hate me,
Dreams that chase me, memories that break me.
I smile for the world — fake grin, cracked soul,
Heart like glass, but I play my role.
Mama don’t call, my friends just fade,
They say “check in,” but they don’t stay.
My mind’s a war zone, my faith is thin,
If peace is real — where’s it been?
I’m dying in slow motion,
Breath by breath, devotion to pain,
They say “you’ll heal,” but it’s hard to believe,
When your shadow’s the only thing that never leaves.
[Pre-Chorus]
And I swear, I’ve tried to scream it out,
But my lungs don’t make a sound.
It’s like I’m buried six feet deep,
And I’m still walking around.
[Chorus]
Payne — yeah, they don’t know your name,
You bleed in silence, drown in shame.
Payne — they don’t see your face,
You’re fighting hell, they call it “phase.”
Payne, in the dark, you pray for rain,
Just to prove you still feel pain.
Oh, Payne…
You’re tired of breathing, tired of the game.
[Verse 2]
Mirror on the wall won’t talk no more,
Just stares back like it’s keeping score.
Every cut, every tear, every time I fall,
Feels like proof I don’t deserve at all.
I’m haunted by the laughter I fake,
By the nights I choke on the dreams I make.
Everybody says “don’t give up now,”
But they ain’t the ones with demons that howl.
I wrote my pain in blood on my sheets,
Hoping my words would make me complete.
But they just echo, fade, then die,
Like every “I love you” that turned to lies.
[Pre-Chorus]
And I swear, I’ve tried to let it go,
But my scars keep saying no.
Every smile’s a loaded gun,
And I’m running out of sun.
[Chorus]
Payne — yeah, they don’t know your name,
You bleed in silence, drown in shame.
Payne — they don’t see your face,
You’re fighting hell, they call it “phase.”
Payne, in the dark, you pray for rain,
Just to prove you still feel pain.
Oh, Payne…
You’re tired of breathing, tired of the game.
[Bridge]
(Whispered / soft singing)
He said, “What’s the point of living,
If the world don’t listen?”
Every prayer unanswered,
Every tear in prison.
He built his heaven out of hurt,
His home inside the dirt.
He smiled at death —
Like, “I’ve seen worse.”
(beat kicks in harder)
Now he’s fighting his reflection,
Heart full of rejection,
Hands shaking, mind breaking,
Begging for connection.
But love don’t answer —
It just leaves him on “read,”
So he writes his pain
Like letters to the dead.
[Verse 3]
He says: “God, if You’re real,
Then why am I alone?”
Why’s every comfort
Carved out of stone?
Why’s every ‘friend’
Disappear when I bleed?
Why do I crave the hurt
More than I need?
He’s tired of “stay strong,”
Tired of pretending.
If life’s a story —
He’s done with the ending.
He’s seen the rain,
He’s tasted the gun,
He whispers —
