A perfect human

So tired of being forced to be perfect

I want to be perfect but I can't be that perfect a person.

Never mind being perfect, I'm already myself

Why are they so selfish?

Is it so difficult for them just to understand?

I've been understanding them all this time but I can't get anything

What do I have to do?

Back down?

Have I given in too often?

Are they that selfish that they don't even let me defend myself?

I'm just a kid who wants to be heard but is it that hard?

When will my time come? I'm tired, too tired to be myself.

Enough of all this falsehood

Sometimes I ask myself why am I doing all this?

But I still don't get an answer

I also can't lie if the person I've been seeing all this time is fake.

But I also don't want to look bad in front of them.

Even now I am complaining but no one cares

And sometimes I think does God love me? But I immediately dismiss that thought

Really, when that thought comes, I feel like I've become the most self-conscious person ever.

But..... Is it wrong to ask for more?

There's only one thing I want

I just want to be understood

But if I ask, I will definitely be an ungrateful person.

I'm scared

I thought being an adult would be that fun.

Turns out I was wrong

God, is it possible for me to go back to the past?

Turns out being an adult isn't that fun

I'm in a dilemma

Do I have to be myself?

Or should I be what they want, a perfect human

When will happiness come to you?

Or am I expecting too much?

But... Hopefully that hope will come true one day

Sorry for complaining God

But there's really nothing I can do but hope in you

Even though I don't know whether it will come true or not

Nobody knows