3 A.M. With the Lights Off

Verse 1]

The world was waiting like we were

News on repeat, nothing sure

Your badge at the hospital, long white halls

Me counting numbers on bedroom walls

I used my savings, bought us space

New furniture, a softer place

Dinners every night with your mom and dad

Laughing like the years we never had

From the outside it finally looked calm

Like we made it through the storm

But peace never found me after midnight

That’s when the fear came on

Every dream I ever had

Was sleeping in the next room

And I stayed awake wondering

If I could keep it true

At three a.m. with the lights off

I kept the future in my hands

If I paused, I knew it was over

If I pushed, we might still stand

Motion was my only safety

Silence felt like being seen

So I kept running toward tomorrow

So my children wouldn’t inherit what was left of me

I knew I’d never make New York money

In a world that slowed its pace

But stability has a price too

And time doesn’t wait

Minority rooms, different rules

Always proving I belonged

I wasn’t chasing more success

I was trying not to be gone

Then one day my name changed weight

Executive Director, headline lines

Advising mayors, papers calling

For a moment, it felt like I arrived

I almost believed I could breathe again

Almost believed I was safe

But safety’s a fragile promise

When your past still keeps the pace

I had everything I worked for

And still couldn’t rest

Because survival taught me

Nothing is ever left

At three a.m. with the lights off

I kept the future in my hands

If I slowed down, I’d be exposed

If I ran, we had a chance

Motion was my only language

Pressure taught me how to lead

I kept pushing past exhaustion

So my kids would never carry my father’s debt inside of me

Then the room went quiet

Music low, doors slow

I watched you walk toward me

In a white dress, taking every step I’d ever owed

And for the first time in my life

The fear loosened its grip

Because standing there with you

Felt like the safest place I’d ever been

At three a.m. with the lights off

I finally understood

That legacy isn’t running forever

It’s knowing when you could

I stopped chasing invincibility

Stopped proving I deserved my name

I married the woman I built my life around

And that’s when everything changed

The world was still uncertain

But one thing was finally true

I didn’t slow down because I was scared

I slowed down because I chose you