Close to Me!

My sage green duvet still smells like you,

I pull away as I fall asleep, but my heart stays glued.

You never reach out, but I still keep you close,

Even when you’re gone, you’re the ghost I chose.

You used to look in my eyes for hours,

Now I pray for seconds — the silence devours.

I know I messed up, I can’t make it neat,

But God, do we taste so bittersweet.

I try to make sure your heart feels free,

Even when you’re not lying next to me.

You said I was home, now it’s just me,

Clinging to dreams of what we used to be.

You’re still the song inside of me.

I wake up at five just to drive through the dawn,

Pretend you’re beside me, though you’ve moved on.

I cook and I clean, it’s not who I am,

But I wanted to show you I gave a damn.

Three weeks of quiet, no concerts, no calls,

I’ve been learning to stand without you at all.

But when I hear your name, it still stings deep,

You’re the ache that never falls asleep.

Dear Noah, I wrote this knowing you’ll never read,

But love still burns even when it bleeds.

I’m growing, I’m healing, but damn it, I cry,

Every time your ghost walks by.

We were art, a little reckless and rough,

Never picture-perfect, but it was enough.

Now I’m proud to say I’m becoming free,

Still learning how to love — maybe even me.

I try to make sure your heart feels free,

Even when you’re not lying next to me.

You said I was home, now it’s just me,

Clinging to dreams of what we used to be.

You’re still the song inside of me.

We laughed in basements, we cheated time,

Got away with everything but the crime.

Now I whisper your name to the moonlight’s plea —

You’re still so close,

So close to me.