Beautiful Damage

I slept in agony last night,

pretending I was hit by a truck —

counting ribs that might be broken,

wondering if my lungs collapsed.

If my legs went numb and useless,

if my body couldn’t move…

I slept inside a quiet coma,

just to silence thoughts of you.

⸻

I imagined not running

when I smell your skin…

But I realized something —

I never stop… I give in.

⸻

I’d only stop running

if it breaks me for real —

crippled, shattered,

no more need to feel.

Broken into pieces,

scattered on the floor…

Maybe then my heart

won’t chase you anymore.

⸻

I stayed awake, staring at the wall,

inviting sleep that never comes…

I see your face beneath my eyelids,

burning shadows in my lungs.

Your gaze won’t let me rest,

your voice won’t let me breathe…

You haunt me in the quiet

like a ghost I can’t release.

⸻

Sweet words echo softly,

your touch I still crave…

I know I’m not helpless —

but I act like a slave.

⸻

I’d only stop running

if it breaks me for real —

crippled, shattered,

no more need to feel.

Broken into pieces,

scattered on the floor…

Maybe then my heart

won’t chase you anymore.

⸻

This isn’t love —

it’s a wound that won’t close…

A beautiful damage

that nobody knows.

I’m strong on my own,

I can stand, I can heal…

But with you…

I forget what is real.

⸻

I’d only stop running

if it breaks me for real…

Until then I’m falling,

again and again I feel.

Broken into pieces…

but still I adore —

every part of the pain

that keeps wanting more.