

Prompt / Lyrics
[Verse 1] Sat down fast My knee said “crack” My spine said “who?” My hip talked back Walk in a room Forget what for Stand there scrolling by the fridge Like it’s a magic door [Chorus] I’m an old FART Factory‑Approved Recurring Toot (hey!) Body doing sound effects Every time I move a foot Yeah an old FART Kids laugh every time I sneeze I just blink Lose my train of thought And forget where I left my keys [Verse 2] Phone in my hand “Where’s my phone?” Glasses on my head Still I groan Squint at the screen Zoom to 200% Look like I’m inspecting Government documents [Chorus] I’m an old FART Factory‑Approved Recurring Toot (ooh yeah) Every tiny stretch I do Comes with its own kazoo Yeah an old FART They roast me every birthday cake “Dad Was fire invented yet The day you graduated eighth grade?” [Bridge] Kids say “You’re so old” I say “Listen here” I’ve survived bad haircuts And rental DVDs My dear You mock my creaks And my wheezy laugh But when you need free babysitting Guess who you call back? (that’s right!) [Chorus] I’m an old FART Factory‑Approved Recurring Toot Vintage model Classic frame With the premium dad‑joke loot Yeah an old FART I’ll be wheezing till I go If aging is a punchline I’m the headlining show (hey!)
Tags
pop, Bouncy campy pop with a touch of musical-theater humor, male vocals; tack piano, upright bass, and goofy brass stabs. Verses stay tight and talky, chorus explodes with gang vocals and claps. Occasional cartoonish sound-effect hits and stop-time jokes to punch the punchlines., comedy
1:31
No
3/13/2026