Yo, turn the headphones up.
We going down to Kent for this one.
Gillingham stand up!
We got a legend in the building.
He’s eleven years old... but he sounds dangerous.
Let’s go!
(Verse 1)
Log in to the Xbox, lights go dim
Controller in the hand, yeah it’s all about him
Check the gamertag, enemies start to sweat
"Satans Venom"—is it a threat? You bet!
It sounds like a demon from a heavy metal band
But he’s just chilling with a headset in his hand
Click-clacking buttons, yeah he never stops
Domination mode on Call of Duty Black Ops!
He’s cranking 90s, Fortnite skills are peak
But don’t ask him to tidy up, he’ll tell you "wait a week!"
(Chorus)
It’s Josh! Oh my gosh!
Eating pasta by the ton, yeah he likes to nosh.
It’s Josh! No time to wash!
Chugging down a pint of undiluted squash!
Yeah, straight syrup, no water in the cup
Satans Venom is leveling up!
(Verse 2)
7:00 AM, put the blazer on tight
Strood Academy, looking fresh and bright
He’s in Year 7, walking down the hall
Acting like he’s six-foot-four and really tall.
But the bell rings for home, and he’s out the gate
Running back to the screen, he simply cannot wait
Switching up the game, yeah he’s giving it all he’s got
Roblox loading up "Steal the Brainrot!"
Collecting all the memes, yeah the server is shaking
But there’s a smell from the kitchen... is that dinner baking?
(Bridge)
Pause the game! Put the controller down!
The best chef in Gillingham is coming to town!
He pushes back the plate, says "Nan, you’re crazy!"
"I need that Spaghetti Bolognese!"
He eats the whole bowl, sauce all on his face
Then runs back upstairs to win the race!
(Verse 3)
Now watch this trick, it’s a medical mystery
The way he drinks juice goes down in history
Most people add water, H2O is the dream
But Josh drinks the cordial straight from the stream!
Orange or Blackcurrant, sticky and sweet
Undiluted sugar, man, it can’t be beat!
His teeth are vibrating, he’s buzzing like a bee
Satans Venom on a sugar-rush spree!
(Outro)
Yeah.
Big up the Strood Academy crew.
Big up Nan on the cooking duty.
And big up Josh.
Satans Venom... signing offline.
(Peace!)
