[Intro - spoken]
Somebody tell Bruce…
If you’re gonna steal a man’s woman,
you better have a license and a ride.
[Verse 1]
Bruce was a snitch from the county jail,
Talked so much he could talk through mail.
Ran his mouth and ran his game,
But everybody knew his name.
He came around with a crooked grin,
Lookin’ for trouble and fallin’ in.
Felecia laughed and Calvin knew,
There ain’t much lower than Bruce.
[Pre-Chorus]
No keys, no car, no alibi,
Just a thumb in the air and a busted pride.
He dug that hole, then he crawled on through,
Now the whole damn town is singin’ ’bout Bruce.
[Chorus]
Bottom of the barrel Bruce,
Ain’t got wheels and ain’t got juice.
Needs a ride but he can’t drive,
Barely made it out alive.
Messed with Calvin, messed with Felecia,
Now karma’s got a subpoena.
Bottom of the barrel Bruce,
Lord, what the hell got into you?
[Verse 2]
At three A.M. he made a post,
Braggin’ like he’d done the most.
Said, “Watch this, y’all, I’m feelin’ brave,”
Then rode a stretcher to an early grave.
Hospital lights and a paper gown,
Nurses tryin’ not to fall down.
Bruce said, “Call me Brucilla now,”
Doc said, “Boy, don’t ask me how.”
[Pre-Chorus]
No shoes, no shame, no getaway,
Just bad decisions on full display.
Felecia said, “Don’t swing, Calvin, please,
That fool’s already on his knees.”
[Chorus]
Bottom of the barrel Bruce,
Ain’t got wheels and ain’t got juice.
Needs a ride but he can’t drive,
Barely made it out alive.
Messed with Calvin, messed with Felecia,
Now karma’s got a subpoena.
Bottom of the barrel Bruce,
Lord, what the hell got into you?
[Bridge]
He can’t stand Felecia’s mama,
Says she’s meaner than a junkyard goose.
She said, “Boy, I warned you once,
You’re lower than possum juice.”
Then Sofe came struttin’ through the room,
With a look that spelled out doom.
Bruce laid down to rest his head,
Sofe climbed up and danced instead.
[Guitar Solo]
[Verse 3]
Calvin loves Felecia true,
Ain’t no line he wouldn’t move.
He said, “I don’t chase rats or fools,
But Bruce, you broke all the rules.”
Now Bruce is out by the county sign,
Thumb stuck up and losin’ his mind.
Every truck keeps rollin’ past,
Even stray dogs haul ass.
[Final Chorus]
Bottom of the barrel Bruce,
Ain’t got wheels and ain’t got juice.
Needs a ride but he can’t drive,
Barely made it out alive.
Messed with Calvin, messed with Felecia,
Now karma’s got a subpoena.
Bottom of the barrel Bruce,
Lord, what the hell got into you?
[Outro - spoken]
If you see Bruce walkin’…
keep drivin’.
He ain’t got gas money,
he ain’t got a license,
and Sofe still remembers.
