Grill Master Blues (Too Small to Handle)

Verse 1

I used to rule the backyard, king of charcoal flame

Apron sayin’ “Grill Master,” yeah I earned that name

Neighbors smelled my burgers from a mile away

But my wife packed her bags one random Tuesday

Pre-Chorus

I said “Baby what’s wrong? Was it somethin’ I said?”

She said “Nah… it’s what you served instead…”

Chorus

She left me over a small wiener 🌭

Said she needed somethin’ just a little bit meaner

I said “Girl it’s all about the flavor and the heat!”

She said “Boy, that thing looks like a cocktail treat!”

Now I’m standin’ by the grill all alone

With a tiny hot dog and a broken home

⸻

Verse 2

I tried to spice it up, threw some chili on top

Even wrapped it in bacon, thought I’d make her jaw drop

She just shook her head, said “This ain’t gonna cut it”

Said “I need a full rack, you out here servin’ nuggets!”

Pre-Chorus

I said “Size ain’t everything, just give it a chance!”

She said “That ain’t a meal… that’s a sample in a stance…”

⸻

Chorus

She left me over a small wiener 🌭

Said she needed somethin’ just a little bit meaner

I said “Girl I got skills, got the smoke and the sear!”

She said “Yeah but that ain’t fillin’ nothin’ over here!”

Now I’m flippin’ regrets on this rusty old grill

With a mini hot dog and a heart to fill

⸻

Bridge (spoken, funny)

Now hold up…

I got thermometers, marinades, secret rubs…

But apparently… that ain’t enough 😔

⸻

Verse 3

Now she’s with a guy who got a footlong game

Drivin’ past my house in a propane flame

I’m stuck here with my buns and a lonely plate

Tryna supersize love but I’m ten sizes late

⸻

Final Chorus

Yeah she left me over a small wiener 🌭

Guess my BBQ just couldn’t please her

I learned real quick in the grilling biz…

Sometimes it ain’t the cook… it’s just what it is 😅