[Verse 1]
Back seat kid in a split-up house
Dad’s new place smells like cheap takeout
Mom’s on the porch
Eyes glazed
Burned out
They trade fake smiles
I tune them out
Two Christmas trees
Same empty box
Suitcase life and a closet of locks
Therapist asks what I really want
I shrug and laugh
Say “I don’t give a—”
[Chorus]
I’m stuck in between your war
Torn like the shirt on my floor
You say “grow up
” I say I’m trying
I’m seventeen and I feel like dying
Screaming in a room that’s quiet
Writing my will on a cracked phone screen
If this is what you call surviving
Why the hell don’t I feel free?
[Verse 2]
Kitchen fight over alimony
I’m upstairs scrolling
Feeling lonely
You both swear you’d “die for me”
I’m just praying you’d look and see
School hall stares
I’m the “sad kid” joke
Hood up
Headphones
Hope they choke
Teacher asks why I missed last week
I bite my tongue till my gums all bleed
[Chorus]
I’m stuck in between your war
Torn like the shirt on my floor
You say “grow up
” I say I’m trying
I’m seventeen and I feel like dying
Screaming in a room that’s quiet
Writing my will on a cracked phone screen
If this is what you call surviving
Why the hell don’t I feel free?
[Bridge]
Dark thoughts
Bright blade on the bathroom sink
Staring at the edge
Too tired to blink
If I disappear
Would you even think
That maybe this was partly on you?
(hey)
But I text my friend
Say “I’m not okay”
He types back “stay
Please fucking stay”
We share our scars in the hallway gray
Guess I’m not alone in this
Are you?
[Chorus]
We’re stuck in between their war
Torn like the shirts on our floor
They say “grow up
” we say we’re trying
We’re seventeen and we feel like dying
Screaming in a world that’s quiet
Breaking the script that they wrote for me
If this is what you call surviving
Then I’ll stay here and learn to breathe
[Outro]
Yeah I’ll stay here and learn to breathe
Middle of the wreck
I still choose me
(shouting) I still choose me
I still choose me