[Verse 1]
Doctor says
“give it time”
I’m counting ceiling cracks
Like lifelines
Numb on the couch
At 3 p.m
Google “would I hurt my kid
Like I hurt myself again”
[Pre-Chorus]
My mother’s voice
In my head
“you’ll understand
When you’re older”
I got older
Got colder
Now I’m scared to even
Hold that future
[Chorus]
I’m breaking the family tree
Let the branches stop at me
If I can’t climb out
How could they?
I won’t pass down
This hurricane
I’m breaking the family tree
Let the branches stop at me
[Verse 2]
Friends have names
Picked out since school
Tiny shoes
By the front door
I write lists
Of all the days
I couldn’t even drag myself
Up off this floor
Face in the fridge light
Midnight glare
Think of small hands
In this heavy air
If I can’t eat
Or brush my hair
How could I teach someone
That the world is fair?
[Pre-Chorus]
They say “you’d be
Such a good mom”
While I’m staring at
The fire alarm
Planned my exit
More than vacations
What kind of cradle
Holds that kind of weight in?
[Chorus]
I’m breaking the family tree
Let the branches stop at me
If I can’t climb out
How could they?
I won’t pass down
This hurricane
I’m breaking the family tree
Let the branches stop at me
[Bridge]
Maybe in some
Parallel room
I’m laughing in a kitchen
Tying tiny shoes
But here in this body
Storm on repeat
It feels like mercy
To leave one empty seat
[low vocal register] Mercy
To leave one empty seat
[Chorus]