[Verse 1]
Greg cuts hair in San Diego, keeps the clippers humming bright
But he dreams of Cape Cod mornings and a reel pulled tight
He'll trade a cape for ocean salt, a comb for a fishing line
Then call his mother from the dock and ask, “What’s cooking tonight?”
[Chorus]
Oh Greg, raise an IPA high
With a pack of Bud beside him and a twinkle in his eye
He’s hunting Pokémon cards like treasure in the sand
And somehow leaves a puddle where the floor was meant to stand
Oh Greg, he’s a one-of-a-kind
A little wild around the edges, but his heart is family-sized
[Verse 2]
He found a card shop down the block, said, “This might be the one”
Came home with three new boosters and a grin like he had won
Then supper hit the table, Mom had worked her magic again
He filled his plate, praised every bite, and nodded off by ten
[Chorus]
Oh Greg, raise an IPA high
With a pack of Bud beside him and a twinkle in his eye
He’s hunting Pokémon cards like treasure in the sand
And somehow leaves a puddle where the floor was meant to stand
Oh Greg, he’s a one-of-a-kind
A little wild around the edges, but his heart is family-sized
[Bridge]
He’s slept through storms on Cape Cod
And snored through Sunday calls
But if one of us needs a hand
Greg’s already at the door
[Instrumental]
[Verse 3]
Now Mom is in the kitchen, and the cousins fill the chairs
Greg is telling fish stories like he caught a county fair
His barber hands are waving, his laughter shakes the room
He loves us loud and sideways, like a favorite old saloon
[Final Chorus]
Oh Greg, raise an IPA high
With a pack of Bud beside him and a twinkle in his eye
He’s hunting Pokémon cards like treasure in the sand
And apologizing for the bathroom in the best way that he can
Oh Greg, he’s a one-of-a-kind
A little wild around the edges, but his heart is family-sized
Yeah, Greg, when the whole day’s done
He’ll eat Mom’s cooking, fall asleep, and love us every one
[Outro]
From San Diego chairs to Cape Cod tides
Greg keeps the whole family laughing on both sides