Only a Pen when I fall

lately i feel trapped against the wall

and no one cares so who can i call

there’s only a pen when i fall

ones upon a time i was happy

but now i barely am at all

i’m back at the nightstand

still got a bottle in my right hand

now i’m at the club drinking

cause fuck a fight man

i remember when you said i would be alright and

now i would rather drowning liquor

by the pint man

smoking and popping pills

just to feel alive again

and pop a few more

just to get a high again

smoking every day

cause it’s one of the only way

to take my pain away

you say it changed me

well fake is real anyway

people fade away

like they said they would never stay

my own family don’t know me

but i think it’s better that way

know one really knows what i feel

i say i’m happy

but that dream is’t real

so i smoke again to get away

from my feels

i been alone so long

keeping my feelings locked up is just how i deal

lately i feel trapped against the wall

and no one cares so who can i call

there’s only a pen when i fall

ones upon a time i was happy

but now i barely am at all

lately

i been stuck in my head daily

been trying to get away

well can you save me

i’m sick of waking up feeling hazy

give me enough pills i will fly like a daisy

end all my pain

i been about cry to much lately

bottled up i feel insane

feeling like i’m going to die

well maybe

take a bullet to the brain

idk i just need to end all this pain

i’m all alone at the end of my lane

no one cares

well i feel the same

maybe god is the fucked up one

playing with me

in these mind games

i’m tripping

maybe i really am insane

or just broken from all the pain

i feel empty inside

i’m wondering if anyone feels the same

i don’t want to die

i just want to end my pain

becoming numb inside

just a man trying to maintain

only got pen to express my pain

lately i feel trapped against the wall

and no one cares so who can i call

there’s only a pen when i fall

ones upon a time i was happy

but now i barely am at all