DO Y’ALL HAVE A GROUP CHAT?
VERSE 1
Downloaded the app
Fixed up my profile cute
Thought I’d find somebody real
Instead I found you
Liked my picture instantly
Matched before I blinked
Acted like you wanted something
Then disappeared, I think
PRE-CHORUS
Rescheduled twice
Third time you ghosted
Meanwhile I got dressed
Meanwhile I got toasted
CHORUS
Do y’all have a group chat?
I’m starting to suspect it
Different face
Different name
Same damn checklist
“Busy”
“Crazy week”
“Soon”
“We’ll see”
Do y’all have a group chat?
Cause the scripts are killing me
VERSE 2
You said you’re not like other guys
Babe, they all say that
I’ve heard that line so many times
I should hang it on a plaque
Six good morning texts
Zero dinner plans
You got dating-app confidence
And grocery-store commitment
PRE-CHORUS
You said you’d love to take me out
Like you had somewhere to be
Then treated making actual plans
Like a national emergency
CHORUS
Do y’all have a group chat?
I’m starting to suspect it
Different face
Different name
Same damn checklist
“Busy”
“Crazy week”
“Soon”
“We’ll see”
Do y’all have a group chat?
Cause the scripts are killing me
BRIDGE
Do y’all have a newsletter?
A webinar?
A training course?
A PDF?
Cause somehow every one of y’all
Graduated with honors
In saying
“I’d love to”
Without ever actually doing it
SPOKEN
“Hey beautiful…”
“Can’t wait…”
“Definitely…”
“For sure…”
…crickets.
FINAL CHORUS
Do y’all have a group chat?
Be honest, I can take it
Different city
Different app
Same damn basics
“Busy”
“Crazy week”
“Soon”
“We’ll see”
Do y’all have a group chat?
Cause y’all ain’t coming up
With this independently
OUTRO
Different face.
Different profile.
Different man.
Same script.
Do y’all have a group chat or something?
Cause the plays are identical.
CoherenceInBloom