WHY AM I LIKE THIS! I wake up clenched like I slept through a fight Jaw tight hands ready for nothing and everything Why am I like this Silence feels loaded Peace feels rented Every calm moment comes with fine print I don’t flinch for drama I flinch for memory WHY DOES MY BODY REMEMBER WHAT MY MOUTH WON’T SAY WHY DOES MY HEART BEAT LIKE IT’S ESCAPING WHY DO I PREPARE FOR IMPACT IN EMPTY ROOMS WHY AM I LIKE THIS Breath tastes like iron Thoughts move in straight lines toward worst-case endings I didn’t imagine I observed (Scream long, tearing) I LEARNED TOO EARLY AND I LEARNED TOO WELL I SAW WHAT HAPPENS WHEN HOPE GETS COMFORTABLE I DON’T TRUST SOFT LANDINGS I TRUST MY FEET WHY AM I LIKE THIS I don’t crumble I lock in I don’t heal pretty I heal correct Every scar still works Nothing decorative SCREAM (rhythmic, relentless) I WAS BUILT FOR WHAT BROKE OTHERS I WAS SHAPED BY WHAT THEY RAN FROM I DON’T NEED SAVING I NEED ROOM WHY AM I LIKE THIS WHY! WHY AM I LIKE THIS (FINAL SCREAM held, raw) BECAUSE I SURVIVED WITHOUT PERMISSION AND LIFE NEVER TAUGHT ME HOW TO COME BACK DOWN I WAKE UP ANGRY AND I DON’T KNOW AT WHO I CARRY A FIRE THAT DOESN’T KEEP ME WARM I TRY TO SIT STILL BUT MY NERVES PACE CIRCLES LIKE THEY’RE WAITING FOR BAD NEWS TO DROP WHY DO I FEEL CORNERED IN WIDE OPEN SPACES WHY DOES MY NAME SOUND LIKE A WARNING WHY AM I LIKE THIS I don’t remember choosing this I remember adapting Every lesson came loud Every mistake stayed permanent I DON’T RELAX I STAND DOWN I DON’T DREAM I SCAN I DON’T HOPE I MEASURE DISTANCE BETWEEN ME AND DISAPPOINTMENT SCREAM (rolling, breathless) I’M NOT AFRAID OF DYING I’M AFRAID OF GETTING SOFT I’M AFRAID OF FORGETTING WHAT HUNGER TAUGHT ME WHY AM I LIKE THIS I watched people fold after they were told they were safe I watched mercy get used as leverage (SCREAM full rupture) DON’T CALL IT DAMAGE CALL IT TRAINING CALL IT EVIDENCE CALL IT SURVIVAL WITH TEETH I DON’T NEED PEACE I NEED HONEST GROUND (SCREAM slower, crushing) I WASN’T RAISED BY LOVE I WAS RAISED BY CONSEQUENCES I WASN’T GIVEN TIME I TOOK IT WHY AM I LIKE THIS Final stretch — no relief (FINAL SCREAM held until voice breaks) BECAUSE LIFE HIT FIRST AND NEVER SAID STOP AND I LEARNED THE ONLY WAY OUT WAS THROUGH

WHY AM I LIKE ThIS