[Verse 1]
I watched my sister Shan-Tel fade away
Couldn't do a thing but hold her hand and pray
(hold her and pray)
Watched the sickness take her piece by piece, day by day
And all the love I had couldn't make it stop, no way
She was my person — she was my everything
The one who knew my soul before I knew what souls could bring
(knew what souls could bring)
[Pre-Chorus]
How do you watch someone you love that much
Fight so hard for life and still lose touch?
(still lose touch)
Shan-Tel, I'm still not over losing you
(still not over losing you)
[Chorus]
I carry you with me in everything I do
But the weight of missing you is something no one ever really knew
(no one ever really knew)
This kind of losing brings a grown man down to his knees
God, I'm shattered — I'm shattered — can somebody hear me please?
(hear me please)
Shan-Tel, I love you — I love you still
(I love you still)
[Verse 2]
You were the one I called when everything went wrong
You were the laugh I needed, you were where I belonged
(where I belonged)
Now Jensen and Tristen and Nola ask me why I cry
And I just hold them longer, trying to feel you in the quiet
(feel you in the quiet)
But the house still has your silence
And my chest still holds the violence
Of a grief that never learned how to leave
[Chorus]
I carry you with me in everything I do
But the weight of missing you is something no one ever really knew
(no one ever really knew)
This kind of losing brings a grown man down to his knees
God, I'm shattered — I'm shattered — can somebody hear me please?
(hear me please)
Shan-Tel, I love you — I love you still
(I love you still)
[Bridge]
I would have taken every moment of your pain if I could
(if I only could)
You were warm when everything was cold
You were brave when I was barely whole
(barely whole)
Tell me how you survive this
Tell me how you stand back up when the whole world goes black
[Outro]
I still sleep with the memory of your last days in my mind
(your last days)
And I wake up reaching — and you're never there to find
Shan-Tel — I love you
I hope you felt me
(I hope you felt me)