Canvas of the Universe

Kindness is a plague

It possesses my mind

and I can’t stop myself

from going ballistic

It uses me as a puppet

to cause everyone to love me

but floods the channels

with self-loathing

I'm a broken device

Still works, yet flickers

I inevitably keep creating

the impossible perfection

but when I break down,

I forget that I have

a life that's dying

I’m enamored by my

canvas of the universe

but there's not a single sketch

of me across all the pictures

Through each word and again,

there's no place or time to rest

My heart swells up, hoping

it's done its best

I’m pacing restlessly and

hover along the edge of

the road, barely looking

Between the beams of light,

there's a chance to follow

but risk being swallowed

or back out from the need

to make everything right

My pupils grew as I knew

I can no longer be the martyr

and the journey is far from over

Grasping onto the one thing

I thought could help me,

the smiles appear revolting

Why am I left here in the dark

when I’m the one who's done

everything for everyone else?

I’m a human... but I can't breathe

There's a reminder

that I don't remember

The gentle scribbles

once had some semblance

but crumbled with time

Flattening down the surface

awakened something darker

My wired circuits

Is this all worth it?