Shaped bottle

There’s a bottle shape silence in this house lessons learned by him drown them out. They said I’ve got his eyes,his temper,his walk. I learned his habit before I could walk. Every promise broke on the kitchen floor. I told myself I wouldn’t want it anymore. I don’t need stories to feel the same pain it’s carved in me like a family name. I see my father in the scars. I hide not from fist, but but in the night I tried to feel less empty to feel okay.The quiet the pull that won’t go away he chose the bottle I fight the urge same bloodline different way trail but I see my father and the scars I made. I’m terrified. I’ll end up the same way. He ran from love like it was a threat I ran to yeah I made it different devices different escape same needed to disappear for a while. They warned me not to follow on his steps. Fear doesn’t break a craving spell, addictions a ghost that knows my name. It whispers your your built the same but love keeps pulling me from the edge. Says you’re not him you’re not the same I see my father in the scars. I bear out but I’m learning scars can mean I cared that I survived every time I said no every shaky except every slow hello I won’t pretend it doesn’t run in me, but I decided what I let be I see my father in the scars I made and I’m trying to not run away