

Prompt / Lyrics
[Verse 1] We kicked in doors for decades Plot armor wrapped us tight Balanced fights on printed grids Bright cantrips in the night Then some cryptic elder grognard Grinned and passed a zine "Here’s a map Ten feet of pole And a death chart Page thirteen" [Chorus] Save or die (yeah, that’s the rule) Welcome to the murder school Every hallway hates your guts Every lever feeds you to the rats We’re terrified (still rolling dice) Bleeding out for awful loot But gods It feels so sharp So true When every stupid choice is you [Verse 2] We argue over marching order "Who’s in front?" "You go!" Wizard’s got three spells all day And one of them is "throw" Cleric prays for basic healing DM just laughs "prepare" "Create water?" "Wrong edition" "Graveyard’s over there" [Chorus] Save or die (again we roll) Dungeon like a sausage roll Every statue Every groove Secret way to end the group We’re petrified (we kick the door) But now the fear is half the fun Every nail we pull Each rung If we explode At least we’re the ones [Bridge] Trap on the chest Trap on the floor Trap on the hinge Trap on the door Trap on the torch Trap on the key "Is there a trap On questioning me?" [Spoken over chugs] "I poke it with my ten-foot pole" "It pokes back for 3d8" "I check for traps" "You find a trap" "I… leave the dungeon" "Wise" [Verse 3] We bribe the orcs with moldy bread Hire ten doomed torchbearers Write our wills on character sheets Name the next poor heirs No encounter math to save us No last-chance safety net But every scar and stupid death Feels like the best we’ve met [Chorus] Save or die (roll those bones) Laughing while we crack our bones Every pit A punchline drop Every TPK A curtain drop We’re horrified But wide awake Trading comfort for control If this is how our heroes break We’d rather be the ones who chose [Outro] So here’s to rust And poison spikes To ten-foot poles And camping nights We came for rules We stayed for dread Old school dreams Of glorious dead
Tags
metal, Hyper-tight melodic death / tech-death hybrid with comedy metal attitude; male vocals. Twin-guitar harmonies over blast-heavy drums, sudden stop-start riffs for punchlines, gang-shouted hooks. Verses frantic and riffy, chorus opens into big melodic lines with octave leads. Brief shred break under spoken-style rant, then all-in final chorus with layered screams and chants., death metal, comedy, melodic death metal
3:29
No
3/31/2026