Split veins

Black or white, no in-between, my mind’s a guillotine,

One second you’re my savior, next you’re dead to me.

Rage hits like a freight train, smashin’ everything in sight,

Tantrums tear the walls down, turn day into night.

Always standin’ on the outside, watchin’ through the glass,

Crowds move like a movie, but I can’t join the cast.

Alone in every room, even when the place is packed,

Echoes in my ribcage, the silence stays attached.

Mom, I still reach for you every time the darkness calls,

Even though you vanished, left me starin’ at these walls.

Cravin’ you like poison, heart keeps beggin’ for your ghost,

You abandoned me a thousand times, but I can’t let you go.

Hooked on the white devil, veins are burnin’ in the cold,

Try to break the chains but the devil’s got a hold.

Every time I swear I’m done, the hunger drags me back,

Same way I still chase you, even though you broke my back.

Black and white, rage and ache, stuck between the two,

Tantrums in my bloodstream, no color but the blue.

I’m the kid you never wanted, now the monster that you made,

Still screamin’ for my momma from this self-made grave.