Relief Is The Only Dream

(Intro - long piano and soft synth build-up)

**Verse 1**

I wake up already losing

Before my feet hit the floor

The mirror doesn’t even judge me

It knows I’ve been here before

Your voice is stuck in the walls

Begging me not to disappear

But I’ve been gone for a long time

I just still look like I’m here

**Pre-Chorus**

I swear I tried to feel the fear

But even fear won’t stay anymore

**Chorus**

You loved me sober

I buried that man alive

I traded days for the night

Just to make it through the night

I rot in plain sight

I lie through my teeth

I know I’m the reason

You can’t sleep

You loved me sober

That’s what makes this hurt

I didn’t lose you to death

I lost you to worse

**Verse 2**

I’ve memorized every excuse

Every look that says “not again”

You don’t ask if I’m okay now

You just ask when it ends

I feel it crawling in my chest

Like it owns me, like it’s earned it

Every bridge I swore I’d burn last

I rebuilt just to torch it

**Pre-Chorus**

I don’t fight it when it calls my name

I just answer and accept the blame

**Chorus**

You loved me sober

I poisoned that trust

You believed in a future

I turned into dust

I rot in plain sight

I fade every day

I swear I see relief

When you turn away

You loved me sober

Now you mourn me slow

I’m not dead

But I’m not someone you know

**Bridge**

(stripped, empty)

If this is rock bottom

Then why does it feel like home?

If I wanted to get better

I wouldn’t be so alone

(building, bitter)

I don’t dream about recovery

I just dream about relief

Five minutes without my skin

Crawling out of me

**Break / Half-Time**

I keep waiting for a reason

Something strong enough to stay

But love feels small next to the need

And I hate myself for saying that

**Final Chorus**

You loved me sober

I couldn’t love me at all

I watched you get smaller

Every time I’d fall

I drained your hope

I learned your pain

I taught you how

To walk away

You loved me sober

Please don’t come back

There’s nothing left to save

And I won’t survive the act

**Outro**

If you hear this when I’m gone

Don’t call it a fight I lost

I stopped fighting a long time ago

This is just the cost

I was loved once.

That wasn’t enough.

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