**Verse 1**
I keep a lighter in my pocket
For bridges I might need to burn
I call it “coping,” call it “honest,”
But I never intend to learn
I say I’m fine while digging graves
For every good thing I touch
If love gets close, I suffocate it
Before it can mean too much
**Pre-Chorus**
I don’t need a storm to wreck me
I don’t need a twisted fate
Give me something almost perfect
And I’ll find a way to break it
**Chorus**
I did this to myself again
Turned heaven into smoke
Took something steady in my hands
And tightened till it broke
I swear I want forever
But I sabotage the start
Every time someone gets close enough
I pull the pin inside my heart
**Verse 2**
I drink just enough to blur the lines
Between regret and sleep
Tell myself I’m “letting go”
But I’m in too far, too deep
There’s a comfort in the chaos
A sickness I defend
If I ruin it before you can
At least I know how it ends
**Pre-Chorus**
I don’t trust love to stay
So I chase it all away
Then blame the world for leaving
**Chorus**
I did this to myself again
Watched the warning signs
Heard your voice go soft with hope
And answered it with mine
But mine was laced with dynamite
And secrets I won’t tell
I kissed you like I wanted peace
Then dragged you down to hell
**Bridge (bare, exposed)**
I don’t hate you.
I hate the mirror.
Hate the hands that push
When someone pulls me nearer.
I don’t fear being alone.
I fear being seen.
Because if you see the worst in me
You’ll know what I mean.
**Breakdown (raw, spiraling)**
I carve exit wounds in open doors
I spit at help, then beg for more
I build my house on fault lines
Then cry when it hits the floor
This isn’t fate.
This isn’t chance.
It’s me lighting the match
With shaking hands.
**Final Chorus (fractured, desperate)**
I did this to myself again
No villain left to blame
Just a pattern dressed like passion
And a love I couldn’t sustain
If I’m drowning, it’s by choice
If I’m bleeding, it’s my knife
I keep asking for salvation
While I’m burning down my life
**Outro**
One day I’ll run out of ruins.
One day I’ll run out of lies.
But tonight I’ll watch it crumble
And call it “no surprise.”
---
HollowVotive
