[Verse 1]
Steam on the mirror
Tile floor cold on our feet
Brand new taps still gleaming
But the morning’s on repeat
Paddy slips
Leaves a trail
Water everywhere he’s been
Turn around
Pale backside
That dumb
Proud
Smiley grin
[Chorus]
Paddy and Mick in the shower
Arguing over who goes first
Loving this palace of plaster and grout
But the toilet’s about to burst
Only one towel in the kingdom
Dripping and laughing aloud
Paddy’s wet butt
Mick just cackles
We’re stupid and strangely proud
[Verse 2]
She leans on the doorway
Arms crossed
Taking it in
Mick’s half dressed
Half drowning
Trying not to let her win
She just lifts up the towel
Wraps it tight like a crown
We’re both stuck in the water
While she parades round the house
[Chorus]
Paddy and Mick in the shower
Arguing over who goes first
Loving this palace of plaster and grout
But the toilet’s about to burst
Only one towel in the kingdom
Dripping and laughing aloud
Paddy’s wet butt
Mick just cackles
We’re stupid and strangely proud
[Bridge]
Who gets the seat?
Who gets to dry?
Who gets to keep
Their last bit of pride? (hey!)
New bathroom glow
Same old fools
Same two idiots
Breaking all the rules
[Chorus]
Paddy and Mick in the shower
Arguing over who goes first
Loving this palace of plaster and grout
But the toilet’s about to burst
Only one towel in the kingdom
She’s walking off like she’s crowned
Paddy’s wet butt
Mick still laughing
This is our castle now