🎶 “Boomers on Facebook”
(Key of A–for Absolutely Unhinged)
[Verse 1]
Woke up this morning to a Minions meme,
With Comic Sans wisdom and a Christian theme.
A blurry screenshot from 2009,
And twenty-seven shares that say “Amen” in a line.
A recipe for jello, a rant on gas price lies,
Then a chain post warning me my cat might be a spy.
“Copy and paste if you still believe in truth!”
And a pic of Jesus riding in a red, white, and blue sleuth.
[Chorus]
Boomers on Facebook, fightin’ with the youth,
Typin’ in all caps, like they’re searchin’ for the truth.
“Don’t trust no TikToks, them kids are all on drugs!”
Just boomers on Facebook… and digital shrugs.
[Verse 2]
Oh, they post their lunch and tag their son’s ex-wife,
With cryptic quotes like, “Real ones stay in your life.”
They think Mark Zuckerberg’s a CIA plant,
And if you disagree—prepare for a rant.
They’ll friend your coworkers, your boss, and your dog,
Then share a blurry video of someone jogging in a fog.
“Seen this???” they’ll ask, with no context or date,
And repost a meme that debunked in 2008.
[Chorus]
Boomers on Facebook, where logic goes to die,
Liking their own comments, and nobody knows why.
They’ll wish you “Happy Birthday!” three months too late—
Boomers on Facebook… it’s pure clickbait.
[Bridge – soft piano, but dramatic]
They’re poking people like it’s 2012,
Sending Candy Crush invites straight from hell.
Reporting memes for “hate speech” now,
While tagging Dr. Phil somehow.
[Final Chorus – choir of confused Gen Zs in the background]
Boomers on Facebook, rewriting the news,
With grainy photos, and vaccine blues.
They miss the good days—but they never log off,
Boomers on Facebook… and we just scoff.
[Outro – kazoo solo, fade out with echo]
“If you love Jesus… share this pic of toast…”
🎵 Boomers on Facebook… we’ve all seen the post. 🎵