[Intro]
Lost soul
On that fentanyl’s dead end road
State of hell
I don’t even know me no more
[Verse 1]
Mama said my eyes look hollow
Told her I’d quit tomorrow
Tomorrow turned to ten more
Ten more turned to sorrow
Tiny blue dust on a mirror
Heart racing, hands getting thinner
Swear I saw God in the ceiling fan
He ain’t say a word, just watched me spin again
Cold floor
Numb jaw
Phone full of texts I ignore
Dealer on read, but I’m ringing his door
Like, “one last time,” then I’m back for more
I’m a ghost in my own house, pacing
Every promise to myself erasing
Every friend that I had, I chased ‘em
Pipe in my hand, that’s my replacement
[Chorus]
I’m a lost soul
Walking down fentanyl’s dead end road
Every step I take, the darker it goes
In a state of hell, where the pain feels close
I’m a lost soul
With a pocket full of burnt-up hopes
Every heartbeat heavy like it’s made of stone
Tell me is there any way back home
[Verse 2]
Narcan in the drawer by the kitchen sink
That’s my safety net, that’s how low I sink
Sister don’t hug me, she smell that stink
Of the poison on my skin, in the way I think
I’ve died three times, came back each one
But I left another piece of me with each run
Everybody praying that I see the sun
I just see a little powder and I come undone
I miss birthdays
Missed court dates
Missed the old me in them hallways
Laughing with the boys in them small days
Now it’s all grey, and it all fades
I ain’t chasing a high, I’m hiding a hurt
Something broke deep first time I got burned
Now the only thing that eases that curse
Is the same damn thing that’s putting me in a hearse
[Chorus]
I’m a lost soul
Walking down fentanyl’s dead end road
Every step I take, the darker it goes
In a state of hell, where the pain feels close
I’m a lost soul
With a pocket full of burnt-up hopes
Every heartbeat heavy like it’s made of stone
Tell me is there any way back home
[Bridge]
If I don’t wake up, tell ‘em I was tired
Of fighting with a body and a brain rewired
Of living in a world where the love expired
Where every single breath felt like barbed wire
If I don’t wake up, don’t paint me saint
I did what I did, I ain’t who I ain’t
Just tell ‘em it started with one little taste
Now I’m lost in a maze that I can’t escape
[Chorus]
‘Cause I’m a lost soul
Walking down fentanyl’s dead end road
Every step I take, the darker it goes
In a state of hell, where the pain feels close
I’m a lost soul
With a pocket full of burnt-up hopes
Every heartbeat heavy like it’s made of stone
Tell me is there any way back home