[Verse]
Clock in, lights dim, shadows on the stall,
Bathroom Bandit got the grip, answering the call.
Said he’s droppin’ logs, but the logs don’t fall,
Chronicle of a chronic, walls tremble, y’all.
Stall door slam, man’s on a mission,
Hand-to-hand combat, solo ambition.
Soap dispenser witness, paper towels missin’,
Mirror got foggy, the faucet stay drippin’.
[Chorus]
Who’s the phantom, lurkin’ in the loo?
Claimin’ number two, but the story ain't true.
Bathroom Bandit, what’s a worker to do?
Chronic beater, shift repeater, we’re all confused.
[Verse 2]
Breakroom whispers, stories gettin' wild,
HR files thicker than a bathroom tile.
“Caught him twice at lunch,” said the janitor with style,
“Man’s a marathon runner, goin’ mile after mile.”
Flush sound fake, hear the rhythm in the beat,
Work boots tappin’ while he’s tappin’ to the heat.
Got the sink on blast, tryna mask the feat,
But the whole damn shift know the pattern's on repeat.
[Bridge]
Late night vibes, when the office gets quiet,
Bandit strikes again, no end to the riot.
Toilet seat confessions, hands movin’ defiant,
Employee of the month? Nah, HR denyin’.