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I didn’t know if it was smarter,
Phone call or in-person starter,
But I knew, even through disaster,
You’re my heart — no one else, no after.


You were perfect, damn, flawless grace,
Wife of lifetimes, soul in space.
Didn’t need a thing, just shine —
You were the next big thing, not waiting in line.

Built from dreams and pink crown light,
Miraculous mind, no wrong in sight.
Always planning, future stacked,
I swear the stars got your back.


I’d give my soul for you,
Catch a bullet, walk through fire too.
Never met another you —
You're the kind dreams never outdo.

I’m sorry I panicked and ran,
Could’ve been that better man.
Still praying for one more dance,
If fate allows a second chance.


No Tinder swipes, no fallback sex,
This heart don’t rebound or flex.
I don’t want anybody else,
You were my calm, my core, my self.

Suicidal thoughts whisper cruel,
But leaving you? Made life a ghoul.
No memes hit, no laughs bloom,
Without you, joy left the room.

Wrote this crying, weeks gone by,
Threw up more than I can lie.
I ruined what I held so dear,
Now silence is my only fear.


You and the cats, the family we dreamed,
Now it’s just echoes and could-have-beens.
If you ever feel unsafe at night,
I’m still your bodyguard in the strobe light.

Always ready, no questions asked,
Whether it’s love or just your past.
You deserve more than a broken fool,
I broke it once, now I know the rule.


I’d give my soul for you,
Catch a bullet, walk through fire too.
Never met another you —
You're the kind dreams never outdo.

I’m sorry I panicked and ran,
Could’ve been that better man.
Still praying for one more dance,
If fate allows a second chance.


I don’t expect you to wait or pause,
But this ain’t fake bravado or applause.
Just know if you ever need me near,
I’ll be the shadow whispering clear:

You were never second string,
You were my forever queen.
Sticky man, still at your side —
Always and forever, no matter the tide.

Goodnight, you two… I’m sorry.

-

jazz, swing, electro swing, witch house, zenonesque, balalaika